Break!

I would swear so much profanity right now but I won't. I know life is unfair and filled with so many disappointing things. Sometimes I tend to forget and give the world the benifit of the doubt because if I won't I will always be bitter and doubt what's around me and it should'nt be like that. The world is filled with wonders and I want to go out there and experience things. I'm still young and I know that I have a lot more time to do the things I want to do. I still have time to meet new friends, meet new people, or maybe meet someone who would love me and take care of me; I am also sure I will meet someone who would hurt me.

Love they say is a wonderful feeling and everyone should experience it. To love someone with everything with nothing holding you back. But what if love turns around and decided to hurt and dissappoint you? I know that's part of life and the cycle and it should be a great lesson to learn.

I learned many lessons in life but I never tend to use what I learn for the future. I think that's my biggest mistake sometimes. Instead of taking care of myself, I look and look for reasons that would would hurt me eventually and it should'nt be like that. People has given me so much advice in love and life and I want to listen to them, to me, for my benefit. They say I should spoil myself or concentrate on myself and not those who are around me. It is still not clear why Im so fixated on certain things in my life.

I seriously need a break. A break from everyone and everything else around me. I need a break from myself. Do you think theres such thing as a vacation away from yourself, from myself? I remembered back in the days, just few months I moved here in Houston, I had so much time by myself and it drove me insane. Not to be able to do anything other than being at home, alone in my room. Now that I have people around me, I work and school and to be involve with someone, I feel like I want to trade it back from the time when I didnt have anyone. Why do you ask? Because I NEED A BREAK! No phones, no chat, no school, no work (well I cant skip work, I have bills to pay :D, but you know what I mean, If only..). I want to be alone in an island or a space ship. lol. Its so hard to ignore people sometimes though, specially when you know they are hurting because of what Im doing.
As soon as school ends, I have few projects that I would like to do. Like a story to finish, drawings to scan and color and photos to manip. Im gonna work so much for the next few weeks so I can distract myself, yet again. I want to be fully 100% happy and content rather than being 25% happy and content, okay maybe Im 40% happy and content. I want to be resourceful and smarter than I am now. I want to GROW UP. I am at an age that should be having a career but it sucks really. Im still silly and child like.
If I can ignore "him" for weeks, I think I can really survive. Of course I cant turn off my phone. Everyone whos anyone calls there. lol. I can try for my laptop though. I need to study for my finals anyways. So, I guess goodbye for now. Im gonna turn things off for awhile. Lets say till after the holidays. And thank you to all my friends who cares and love me so much. I am very thankful to all of you. Thats my thanksgiving thankful speach. lOL!

HAVE a SAFE and AWESOME HOLIDAYS EVERYONE!!!!!!!!

Find me a good...

man!!! lol

why is it so hard to find a good man?


yea, they say

I'll take care of you, ill love you, Ill make you happy.. blahblahblahblah!

lol im bitter again :P

Why do we choose?

Why do we some people choose to love a "cheater"
rather than a good one?
why do we always believe that they
are good even they are not?
maybe because in love,
you can't see the bad reality of things,
unless you get hurt by them..
you'll suddenly realize how worst that person is..
that's the pathetic part of being inlove
that sometimes even the "worst person" in
this world can be the best person for
your own belief... -B.M.-

Yay for my new blog!!! Don't ask why I have a new one. I just do :P